One Hour Into Paci Sobriety and it is ROUGH Going People!

My three and a half year old daughters name is Kylie Jo and she is a night time paci-aholic.  She is one hour into her paci sobriety and it is rough going people.  She is crying her overtired cry as we speak which is just never a good sign of the things to come.  I cannot believe that it's only been one hour.  Lord help us all!

So I know you are judging me right now.  Yes she is three and a half years old.  Yes I should have done this a LONG time ago.  Umm I was straight terrified and with good reason.  Ya see Kylie Jo doesn't do well with change.  It's just not really her cup of tea!  And when she's struggling with change or fears during the night she clings to the comforts of her blanky and paci.   

So I just kept pushing back the dreaded "detox" night.  Yet a few days ago I realized she isn't even a toddler anymore.  My baby girl is a kid.  She has ditched pull ups completely because she is potty trained HALLELUJAH.  She feeds herself, dresses herself, brushes her teeth, talks to God like a pro, looks out for her little sister, and sleeps (we'll use that word loosely tonight) in her big girl bed without rails on it.  

I couldn't put off the paci exit from her life any longer so for the past few days I've really given our Sleepver Paci Party a lot of air time.  I mean I have worked this night up so much that tonight when I was trying to get out of it (Oh YES I was...judge away!) Kylie Jo was begging me to "sleepover". 

So one of us bounded up the stairs excitedly awaiting the oh so fun sleepover party.  Kylie got to pick out her favorite pajamas, we made myself a lovely mound of blankets so I could pretend that I was not sleeping on the floor, we prayed a long prayer that had a lot to do with a good night of sleep, we left the door open so mom could sneak out more easily later, and we flipped the light.

For a whole 2 seconds it was quiet and then the real party began.  

"Mom.....I want to sleep on the ground with you."

"No Kylie Jo.....then we won't sleep at all....you sleep up there in your nice comfy bed and I'll sleep in my nice comfy pile of blankets" (LIES all lies: I should have gotten more blankets I can feel the floor.)"

After a few minutes of Kylie trying to ask me questions......

"Kylie Jo a sleepover party means that you have to sleep.  No more talking.  If you don't stop mom will have to go downstairs to sleep in my own bed."

"It is reeallly hard for me to fall asleep.  I want my paci.  I need it to suck on mom."

"I know this is really hard for you but you are a big girl and dad and I are SO proud of you for deciding to sleep without your paci.  You still have your blanky so love on that."

A moment of silence.....then small kicks to the wall and whining/fake crying noises begin.  

"I don't want to have a sleepover party with you I want dad to come up and do it with me because I want my paci"

Translation.....dad will give in because I am too darn cute!

"No dad has to work tomorrow sweet girl so it's just you and mom.  Now lay back down, close your eyes, and get some sleep."

" I am just a big girl who needs her paci though.  But I don't want to be a big girl anymore.  I want to pretend to be a baby because babies have paci's.  Let's pretend that Kylie Jo is a baby mommy."

Ahhh she used mommy.  The girl is good.  My heart strings are a little twisted....I sorta wanna give in....oh my nice warm bed.....NO remain strong.  You can survive this night!

"Nope...you're a big girl."

"Mommy will you rub my head because I am having a hard time sleeping without my paci."

"Sure."

Rub head for what seems like an eternity.....my arm is at a funny angle so the blood circulation is weird....and the head rubbing is not even working.  I know that I need to just leave the room because my presence is not helping.  This sleepover party was a really bad idea!  I lovingly let her know that I am going togo downstairs and somehow it works.  

After an hour of talking to her beanie babies that she lovingly refers to as her guys, things get quiet and by some miracle of God she actually falls asleep.  I didn't hear a peep from her until 7:15 in the morning.  Night one of paci detox went a million times better than I could have ever envisioned.  Nap number one (that'll be a big fat playtime with her guys) and night number two here we come!  

Pretty soon she can stand in her paci-aholic meetings and announce that she's been sober for a week which is the hardest hurdle to jump.  Right? :)

Good bye dear and faithful paci.  You are officially being retired!  Thanks for saving us countless times from loudness in quiet places, for calming fears, for good nights of sleep and for thousands in dental costs down the road.  I don't know if I am ready to throw you away.  You were the last baby thing to be grown out of and all the sudden that is very sad to me!